Epilogue: Return of the FREaK

As I mentioned in my last post, hearing such disturbing news about my ex-boyfriend, helped me to eradicate him from my mind and life immediately. I was moving on.

Over the summer, I saw some speed dating event for "tall singles" online. Why the heck not, I figured. I had always been curious about speed dating, and figured if nothing else, I would most likely meet some characters who I could blog about. So, I called my friend Sue, and she agreed to go with me.

Sue and I met across the street from the downtown bar where the tall singles speed dating was to begin in approximately 5 minutes. We watched skeptically as tall, yet overweight, balding (if not already completely bald) men entered the bar for the event. Well, we already paid, so what the heck. We crossed the street, and went into the bar.

It was pretty much exactly what I expected. For those of you who have never been to a speed dating event (and I don't recommend you start now), there were about 10 men, and 10 women, and we were assigned seats throughout the bar, and told that the men would rotate to us and we would sit and talk for three minutes. Yessss, at least I wouldn't have to walk around in these heels.

The first few guys I met were nice, but let's just say, were not my type. I was on my second glass of wine, and trying my hardest to continue smiling. My head was down, because we had to mark down our "rating" of each guy after we met him. I saw a shadow out of the corner of my eye, as the next guy sat down. I looked up, my smile permanantly plastered across my face. I could not believe who sat across from me.

It was FREaK.

Strangely, the first thing that ran through my head was, he's not even tall! He is like, 5' 10" at best, and the event is only for men over 6 feet!

Uh, hi J, he mumbled, clearly as uncomfortable as I was.

I stared at him in silence, perma-smile and all, frozen and unable to speak. So, he took that as a cue to continue.

I, uh, I know the girl who runs these things, so I, uh, thought I'd check one out. How ya been? Can I get you a drink?

I replied in one word: NO, and ran the fuck outta there.

The girl in charge, FREaK's friend, ran after me. After all, if there were 10 guys and only 9 girls, the whole speed dating thing wouldn't go as planned.

Sweetie, is he your ex or something? Don't run out! Then HE wins! You don't want him to win, do you? she coaxed.

I just laughed, texted Sue that I'd meet her after the event, and walked down the block.

Thankfully, that was the last time I saw him.

From the Vault: FREaK

So apparently it takes me getting the flu to get back on track with this blog. Sorry, to my now 13! loyal followers. But here is one for your reading pleasure...

Due to the lack of posts, I decided to go for the big one; the sure-to-be climax of all my dating stories: FREaK.

FREaK and I met on Match.com over 2 years ago. Our first date was perfect, and the next few were as well. Within a week, we were a self-proclaimed couple, boyfriend and girlfriend if you will. He even helped put together a last minute 25th birthday party for yours truly. I really thought I had found my Prince Charming...Boy, was I wrong!

The next nine months were rocky to say the least. Some days, FREaK really was my prince charming. He was attentive, romantic, and funny. Other days, he would be distant, disappear for the night or weekend, or leave me literally waiting for him for hours on the stoop of his apartment. The sex was rare and unexciting, but I didn't care. I was in love.

After a quick breakup over the summer that lasted about 3 days, we got back together, and then broke up for real in December. The breakup came as a complete surprise for me. I was sitting on my couch with my suitcase, as we had planned a romantic getaway to Mystic, Connecticut for the weekend. FREaK came over and comfessed, that he just didn't "feel right" going to Mystic with me, when he "wasn't in love with me."

You can feel bad for me now, I sure did. I was a mess for a good two months, barely eating, and hoping to run into FREaK at any chance I could get.

I thought that he was my one true love, and I truly believed I would never get over him. That was until one email changed everything.

Dear J,
I know you don't know me, but I know you. I am FREaK's girlfriend. I am writing to you on behalf of Saturday night. I know you drunk texted FREaK to hang out. I am asking you out of the kindness of my heart not to contact him anymore, as we are very much in love. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter and I wish you luck in all of your future endeavors. If you need to contact FREaK, please do so only through me, at FREaKsGirl@aol.com. Thanks again.
-FREaKsGirl

Ok, so I admit, I had drunk texted FREaK on Saturday. However, he had been texting and calling me as well. It seemed we were both having a hard time letting go, not just me.

I wrote back a very mature, angry email to FREaKsGirl.

Dear FREaKsGirl,
You should tell your wonderful boyfriend, who you are so in love with, to stop contacting ME every single week. I texted him once. ONCE. He calls/emails/texts me EVERY SINGLE WEEK, so get over yourself.
-J

Ok, so maybe it wasn't mature, but I was pissed.

A few hours later, I recieved this response:

J,
I meant no harm in sending that email. I'm sorry if I offended you. FREaK has been nothing but a loving boyfriend to me...however, in the past few hours some new, incriminating information has come to my attention. I don't know what to do. Just looking for a little woman-to-woman looking out for eachother. If you would like to discuss, please call me at 555-9124.
-FREaKsGirl

Out of sheer curiosity, I picked up the phone and dialed. FREaKsGirl was a nice enough young girl, in the midst of what seemed to be a panic attack. In between trying to catch her breath, she relayed the disturbing information to me:

FREaK has been disappearing a lot lately. Like going away for the weekend, and not answering his cell phone and stuff. Did he ever do that to you? (Yes.) So when he left for work this morning, I decided to go through his stuff. Did you ever do that? (No.) And you will NOT, [gasp] BELIEVE [sob] WHAT I FOUND! You know those drawers under his bed? (Yes.)THEY ARE FILLED WITH DILDOS, A LATEX BODY SUIT, BUTT PLUGS (What are those?), WOMEN'S UNDERWEAR, AND A PAIR OF SIZE 14 WOMAN'S HEELS!

J, are you still there? There's more.

So then I logged into his computer. I went under his "favorite" sites, and found out that he is IN A SEX CLUB! Like one, where they all meet up and have giant orgies! His photo is posted and EVERYTHING. His interests are listed as "anal stretching, emotional manipulation, and RAPE FANTASIES. RAPE!!!"

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. So I did both. And then I called FREaK at work.

WHAT THE FUUUUUCK! I screamed into the reciever.

Just calm down, FREaK reassured me, not wanting to create a scene at his prestigious law firm.

I frantically relayed everything that FREaKsGirl had just told me, praying he would say she is a lunatic, of course none of it's true, he is breaking up with her immediately, etc, etc. But instead, all I got was silence. Eerie silence. He really didn't have to say anything. His silence said it all.

And suddenly, just like that, I was very much over FREaK...